A friend of mine, who's been following my blog, called recently to ask if I am REALLY sick. "Looking at your pics on your blog and reading your Face Book comments, you seem like you're having a ball of a time....no need to work, going for manicure, pedicure, shopping, etc...while poor souls like me are working my b*** off! Are you really sick?"
I replied that I am really sick and I am still being treated but I don't want to put my life on hold while my health is taken care of. After what I've been through, I know that life is short, so I don't waste my time worrying about what might have been....the reality is "what is".
As for working her b*** off, I reminded her that I'd worked for 32 years and I have paid my dues...now it's "me time!" I used to worry about everyone and everything else (my family, my job, the recession, my cat) that I don't have time to worry about myself. But now, I am determined to be "selfish" and put me first. If I feel like taking off and having a break somewhere else, I will...if I can find someone to accompany me, that is!
I would like to emulate the late Ms. Wong Hoi Wan, who was the Chairman's Secretary at my former place of work. Hoi Wan (God bless her soul) had breast cancer but she lived her life right to the very end doing things she loved doing such as playing tennis and even things she'd never done before such as karaoke-ing and long lunches with friends.
Each time I put on my golf attire to join my friends at the golf course, my mum would fret that I should not be too "gungho" while recovering...that I should stay home to recuperate...that complications to my illness is caused by my not observing all the "pantang" (forbidden things) after surgery.
"But mak, if I stay home I'd be miserable and that will not help my recovery. My friends are my life, and being out on the golf course is therapeutic...I enjoy the camaraderie, bantering and "cakap merapu" with the girls. So, please understand that I am healing rather quickly because of my determination to live my life to the fullest - and not because I am at home moping about my health".
So, to all who know me out there...if you see me up and about and having fun, you know what's going on!
"Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you represents determinism; the way you play it is free will" - Jawaharlal Nehru
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